the innocence of early childhood

i'm always regaling any willing listener of stories about maggie and ryan. i thought i'd post this one on here as it is one which has always received a laugh and shows (to me at least) how sweet and innocent maggie is.

a couple of weeks ago i was trying to get a few extra morning minutes in bed. i knew the minute my feet touched the floor i would not get a chance to rest untill the kids had gone to bed. i started to run through the mental check list of "things-to-do". catch up on laundry, pump milk for ryan's rice cereal, make breakfast (egg-in-a-hole sounded good), drop maggie off at pre-school, run to the market for basics, pick up food for cats, call health insurance, pay bills, contact school prof, sign up for cbest, sort through mount everest pile of mail covering my dinning table, research this, research that.....

maggie had been up running around in her chirpy self for ten minutes or so and i was grateful that eric was being good entertainment for her. then i heard her announce that she need to "go potty". i heard the usual banging around of step stools and potty seats before she called for me. "mommy!". not the; "look mommy, i'm so proud of me" mommy call, but the "mommy i'm really hurting" call. selfishly, i did not move a muscle and considered that eric could handle what ever the problem was. it didn't sound that bad. maggie called again and again, each time her intonation more intense. out of bed i jumped, quickly forgetting the long list of things i hoped to get through that day and how tired i already felt.

i found maggie sitting on the potty struggling to push out "poop". eric had done a good job of trying to relax her but only mommy would do. a stranger looking at her would be able to tell how uncomfortable she was feeling. i sat with maggie on the cold tiled floor for twenty minutes, possible more. she held on to me wih a death grip trying to push out her poop and i did my best to sound calm and reassuring. "mommy it hurts", "mommy don't leave me", "mommy, i can't", "no, i don't want you to look". "i can't do it mommy". "mommy it hurts".

and then the poop came out. i paused, my eyes on maggie ready to take her lead. would she be afraid, did she tear, was there blood, did she eat something indegestible, is she still hurting, did it all come out? i really needn't have been so concerned. maggie stood up proudly, turned around on her little step stool --nickers and pants around her ankles and peered into the toliet bowel. "look mommy. look! it's brown! oh it's so big! oh mommy it's so beautiful! mommy look!"