I read this book in college and was well aware, from first hand experience and that of my husband, the kind of hostile environment corporate work was becoming -- longer working hours, extended work weeks that rolled over into the weekend, fewer perks, less job security and the list goes on. The voices of my parents and grandparents juxtaposed the images of White Collar Sweat Shop in the background with talks of trade unions, wage vs. salary and job security and I realized how quickly time can change all things, great and small. After all, all I'm really talking about here is thirty or so years between two generations.
I joked recently to a friend that my new fantasy was to be a "housewife in the fifties". At least then, I said, "I'd be recognized for the "work" I was doing and I'd have my husband back at a reasonable hour with plenty of opportunity for some relaxed family time." This joke, and partial wishful thinking, would have ruffled my feminist feathers when I was graduating from high school sixteen years ago but today it is a reflection of my growing frustration with the demands made upon my family.
To cut to the chase, the last few months have been a real test of patience and understanding. My husband (whom I love more than ever, and more with each day that passes)has been working insane hours. Without having actually logged his hours of work I'd guesstimate he's at least putting in eighty hours a week. He regularly stays overnight near his customer sites and within the last three months has been out of state on business two times. We've all definitely felt the strain.
My husband recognizes the time he's missing out on with his children and the time he's missing out with me as much as we all miss his presence. The whole family has been learning to accept our new reality as my husband's work continues to demand so much of him and his time. Dinner time when daddy's home now becomes something to celebrate, embrace and enjoy. The map puzzle of the United States gets pulled out anytime Daddy goes out of state so we can see where Daddy is travelling to, my trips to the market with both kids have become increasingly educational and fun (for the kids) and less errand like, cooking dinner has become an art form as I entertain my one and a half year old wrapped around my leg or otherwise entertained by the washing machine on its final spin , and run commentary on my four and half year old performing animal sounds and gestures (or operate the remote control for the DVD player) all while I'm thinking of what tomorrow is going to bring.
As I sit here tonight and reflect on all of this, I realize that I have finally come to accept the new reality I've found myself in and have stopped trying to change the things I can't change and started to appreciate all that I have that much more. It has been and is a challenge to find the right balance of meeting my own needs and that of my family, but when I've got it right -- the result has been magical, priceless and seemingly timeless.
