What I want for my children

so my big sister is coming out to visit me and i am addicted to checking her myspace profile. i think i've practically ingested every single detail she's added or changed. i love her so much. i always will. sometimes i'm enamored by her, sometimes i want to shake her by the shoulders and ask her "why!?' i've no doubt her mind boggles over the things i do too and given the things she has said and done for me, i am certain she loves me unconditionally too.

however, growing up we were often at odds with each other. when i became a mother i became fearful that it would be the same for my children. i was concerned for the hurt and pain my children might bring on each other and the hurt and pain eric and i might unwittingly put upon our children. ever since my first child was born i have been conscious of the inevitable second child that we dreamed of having and sought a "magic ingredient" that will teach my children the ways of "getting along" rather than fighting and abusing or bullying each other through their growing years.

today i had an epiphany about it all while i was browsing my sister's myspace profile. the bottom line is that despite everthing, from the small stuff to the big stuff, the protective love i have for my sister has been unfaltering. despite the distance between us, figuratively and literally, we are sisters and we are there for each other when it really matters.

So, while i hope for a peaceful household of loving siblings -- what i will strive for is the same kind of love my sister and i share.

more of the same

nothing new to report about today, but there has been a few lovely moments.

maggie asked me today if we were "in a pile of cars" when we were stuck in some traffic. it was lol funny when she said it. so, so cute. i also weighed ryan today and he came in at 15 and a half pounds! such a giant -- he'll be three months in five days. there's still no telling what he'll look like when he's maggie age, he seems to be changing every day in one small way or another. he's holding on to his hair well, but it's definitely falling out. and i just love his smiling dimples that he flashes with his big gummy grin – it's one of the few traits i can lay claims to.

i managed to do a very simple yet overwhelming thing tonight -- i put together a tasty, fresh and healthy meal for everyone. tilapia fish with a parmesan dressing, brown rice and a yummy green salad. ooh it was good. much better than ordering in :-) the fish dressing was a little on the salty side for my taste but we all gobbled it up.

now what to cook for tuesday's dinner. i love my fish but i'm thinking of looking for a nice veggie dish....

a good conversation

i have five minutes here and wanted to document the wonders a good conversation can do for the soul.

i just got back from picking up maggie at her pre-school and got talking to two other mothers. it was just small talk, but it did wonders for my spirit. i think it's because the other mothers were quite like myself. no pretensions -- just basic good people.

it feels good to know there are others like yourself out there.

everyday, something new.....

maggie climbed out of the bath tub on her own today while i was in her bedroom, fixing it up for her bedtime. she has grown, grown, grown. she managed to climb in and out several times (with me present this time) and showed me just how easy it was for her to do.

mental note to self -- don't leave maggie alone in bathroom. ever.

i have also discovered why it is that maggie insists on leaving the bedroom light on a low dim. so she can see her books. not because she's afraid of monsters in the closet or under her bed, but so she can see her books.

ahhh. bless her little cotton socks

so i'm thinking...

so i'm thinking.... i need to get in shape. i'd say back in shape, but that wouldn't really be very honest. i don't think i ever been physically fit. i've lucked out with good genes which have helped me keep a slender statue but that's about it. i'm interested in getting a new book "you are what you eat" based off a u.k. tv show (thanks for the rec. jojo).

i realize, of course, the effort really needs to come from within and i think i'm at a place in life where i can really apply myself to the task. generally speaking i do try to choose healthy options but you can only have so much take-out for that to still be true :-). i usually also only eat when i notice i'm hungry which is often right after i notice that i'm feeling irritable -- not good.

my first couple of goals are to do with my general eating habits. my plan is to eat at regular intervals (actually having breakfast would be a good start), include more fruit and veg in my diet and drink more water. the long term goal is to provide healthy and quick "no fuss" meals at home for myself and growing family as a everyday occurrence and less of a momentuous occasion -- a task i find much more daunting and overwhelming than any other.

so, i guess i'll be blogging my progress from time to time on here.... anyone got some recipies they want to share?

whatever happened to winter

went out for a two mile walk today with maggie and ryan in the "jogging stroller" which, i might add, for all intense and purposes will never be used for jogging. i could not believe how hot it was. by the time i got to the turnaround point (coffee shop and subways for lunch today) i was a hot sweaty mess.

it is sunny days like this is when i feel practically mystified by how i ended up living in southern california with a devoted husband and two lovely children.

maggie and her dance class

i have succumbed to putting maggie in a dance class. just as i was beginning to think "gymnastics" to help her with general motor skills and coordination (and help learn how to do "home gymnastics" safely) she began requesting music to dance to in the living room. i never thought i'd put my daughter into a dance class -- especially not as young as 3yrs 4months but i have to admit, after seeing her in class today, the benefits become gleamingly obvious. and boy did she enjoy herself.

so, for as long as she's enjoying herself i'll be taking her to those classes. she was so beautiful. happy and innocent. ps haven't written anything about ryan yet -- he's doing great. all smiles. he's big and strong too, lifting his head and shoulders really well. 'reckon he'll be sitting up and crawling before we know it. he's also got quite a vocabulary going of oohs and ahhs and gurgles and laughs. he's just so squiggie, warm and snuggly. very lovely.