So Much To Be Happy About...

I've been busy. Busy with happy things and busy with things which need to be taken care of. Let me begin with my datenight last week. It was Wednesday night, the night off he planned for me for Mother's Day. It was a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful evening. Grandma J came over to look after the children around four in the afternoon which gave me time to get into a fresh pair of jeans (my uniform of choice) and a cute new top I purchased for the event. Hubby and I left at five, relaxed and happy to be out of the house together while the sun was still up. I can't remember the last time we were out alone without the kids when it was still light so this alone felt pretty darn special. We made it to our old familiar stomping ground in L.A. with enough time to enjoy dinner at a favorite Indian restaurant we used to frequent.

We sat and waited for our food to come and it was still light outside. I smile now as I write this and can see hubby's face with his goofy smile, along with slouched shoulders and seriously old but much loved tee-shirt. The food was up to its usual scrumalicious standard and it was a great treat not to be asking for the cheque to go before and entrees hit the table. Spending quality time with hubby and enjoy each others company as we did when we first met, if not more so, was the a biggest reward of the entire evening. It is a very comforting feeling to enjoy your partner of ten plus years without the chaos of life for distraction.

The show, "Wicked", was far from a disappointment too. Hubby went all out and got some super tickets. We were thirteen rows from the front and pretty much in the center of the front stage. There were a three little girls around Maggie's age sitting in front of us looking too cute for words, donned with their best dresses and hair pinned up -- sitting next to their equally cute L.A. style mothers. Eric and I looked at each other and I'm sure we were thinking the same thing -- We have to take Maggie to the theatre this summer. But the show, the show, the show. More about the show. It was a musical so had lots of singing and dancing and jumping about the stage with a little bit of flying and special effects thrown in. Overall it was a great show to see and it was interesting to see the how the plot unfolded if not a little predictable for my analytical mind. The singing was exemplary and some of the songs were particularly touching -- I can foresee many a high school putting on their own production. I think though, I may have outgrown my love for musicals and might just prefer to see a play instead but hey, I'm not complaining. We had a great time. It was a lot of fun and a great date night. One I shall not forget.

Moving on to this past weekend -- it was a lot of fun too. Hubby has been out of town and no, that is not as the reason why it was so much fun. One of the other trillion reasons I have a lot to be happy about is the graciousness of my in-laws. I really couldn't ask for a better pair. This weekend my father in-law fulfilled a promise he made to me on my birthday back in January. He came down to paint my bathroom. Let me say that again. My father-in-law came down to paint my bathroom, a bathroom that has been on out list to do for about three years now. We supplied the paint and all the tools and he did all the hard work of sanding, prep and painting. Wow! What a guy.

Though I couldn't do much to help out with the actual painting and prepping part of the bathroom it has been great to have his company. My children just adore him and its been truly splendid having him around. He bought out a different side to Maggie that I don't get to see that often and caused my son to spin around on his stomach with excitement just by knocking at the door in the mornings. And for me? For me, he has given and shown me so much more than a painted bathroom, so much more. I don't mean to sound so pathetically sappy here but my father-in-law has shown so much integrity and class it has been inspiring and quite frankly, a life learning experience. I am and always will be grateful for the love and respect he has shown me. I am truly honored.

Last week Maggie also had her own art show at her pre-school. This is her last week so it was quite a poignant moment to attend her school's annual art show. Maggie had four pieces on show complete with a little photo of herself next to each piece. Sparkling apple cider and lots of great finger food was provided by the parents of the pre-schoolers and overall it was a great evening with a chance to thank the people who had made Maggie's year of pre-school a memorable and positive one. I was also more than happy to part with my dollars to pay for Maggie's art work. Believe it or not, and with biased aside, her pieces are frame worthy. I'll be sure to look out for some good deals on frames and if I knew how to scan and upload photos I would be posting them on here too. Her collection consisted of a blue collage on canvas, a Pollock inspired canvas piece, a sand paint on black canvas piece, and a Picasso inspired portrait piece. It really was amazing to see what creativity the teachers were able to pull out of my little Maggie and the high level of art work many of the other kids showed. It was lovely. If I didn't think I was robbing another parent of their kids work I'd be buying some of the other kid's work too. This week is Maggie's last and final week of pre-school. I am sure it will whip round to Friday before I know it. I can tell already that I'm going to burst some water banks. My big girl is just growing up too fast.

Mother's Day Surprise

My husband, great man that he is, isn't all that great about gift giving. I'd say his skill in gift giving is right up there with his reluctance to do housework, cooking -- or gardening for that matter. For a little perspective, he choose to give me an electronic toothbrush for the first birthday as his wife; Walgreens was the only store open before 10am the morning of my birthday. As the years have passed I have sometimes gracefully and sometimes not so gracefully accepted this part of our relationship but ultimately always believed in the sanctity of it.

To give hubby credit, he has slowly improved over the years but he's never going to be a guy who showers me with gifts and lines up surprise parties no more than I'd want him to be that way that guy. However, since the arrival of our children I have felt the display of affection and note of appreciation is definitely one which should be displayed as an example for our children to model from; believing that through us they learn how to love and respect one another, themselves and us as parents.

Henceforth the email I sent to hubby on Friday about mid-day titled "Some Ideas for Mother's Day". In it I listed suggested a place to pick up a card with the kids, some light housework chores to do and some fun kid projects to do and some photos of the kids. Thankfully hubby was not offended and took it in his stride. Little did I know he had already made a start on honoring me for mother's day.

I got not one card on mother's day but three. One from each child and one from hubby. The three of them came huddling in my room after a lovely two hour solitary lay-in. The sight of all three happy and proud little faces at the end of my bed as they each handed me a card was picture perfect and bought me to tears. Maggie asked why I was crying and I got to tell her it was because I loved her, Ryan and Daddy so very much and was just really happy and so very proud. I'd say this was the moment of my mother's day which will stand the test of time the best. Their faces and warm bodies just melt my heart away and without anyone one of them I wouldn't be the mummy I am.

But, but, but... there is more. I also received two bouquets of flowers. A sneaky decoy from the market and another delivered my mail on Saturday with a hallmark worthy poem written by hubby and a wonderful box of choccies to share -- plus, plus, plus....a date night for next Wednesday to see the musical "Wicked". Oh what a lucky gal I am. I am. Oh what a lucky gal I am.

Tonight, I shall sleep well. Can't wait for tomorrow start. I feel so blessed and am so grateful for the love which surrounds me. I'll just work on the housework today and schedule that family portrait myself and count down the days to wednesday.

Maggie Learns How To Say Sorry.

I've been having a couple of momentous moments with Maggie this past week. She's been learning the art of saying "sorry". And I have been learning the art of keeping my cool while negotiating my way around the logic of a four, almost five year old. The following is a close example of one of the many conversations we've had over this past week. Enjoy.

Me: Maggie its time to turn off the movie and get ready for school. Please get your shoes on.

Maggie: No!

Me: Maggie.... (spoken with my warned inflection)

Maggie: No. I don't want to!

Me: Maggie what's the matter? You sound very upset.

Maggie: I don't want to turn the movie off! (...tears sulking and whining infuse...)

Me: Maggie, you knew what my expectations were. Now it's time to turn the movie off please.

Maggie: I'm upset. I'm the most upsetest today. I will be upset all day and will never ever be happy again. Never ever.

Me: Maggie I'm turning the movie off. We're going to school. Get you shoes on please.

Maggie: No..... mummy. No mummy! Don't do that!

[by this point Maggie retreats to her room and I give her some "time out" before I enter]

Me: Hello Maggie. What are you doing in here?

Maggie: I'm sad.

Me: Why are you sad Maggie?

Maggie: I was looking at the pictures of you and it made me feel sad.

Me: Why is that Maggie?... Use your voice please, not your tears...

Maggie: I'm sad for the way I spoke to you.

Me: Oh Maggie... Do you need a hug?

Maggie: Yes (whimpering). I'm sorry Mummy.

Me: Sorry for what Maggie?

Maggie: I'm sorry for screaming and crying.

Me: It's okay to be upset Maggie but you need to use your voice. It's important to tell me how you feel. Now what's the other part of saying sorry?

Maggie: [sniffling a little] I don't know. You tell me.

Me: You ask what you can do to make it better.

Maggie: What can I do to make it better mummy?

Me: You can get your shoes on for school.

And off she went to get her shoes on without any whinning, stalling or fussing. It felt like a grand, grand, proud mummy moment.

Pax Is Just A Stuffed Toy

There was once a day when I could talk my way in and out of almost anything with short and age appropriate explanations and reasoning. I could even use my child's personification of inanimate objects to get her to do something. Not so much these days.

Now all I hear is, "Why's that?" or "what does that mean?" While these can be answered one right after the other with ease at the beginning of the day, patience starts to wear thin at the end. But, we are working through them and I'm learning a new parenting skill on how to say anything but the ultimate mummy mantra "...because I told you so" or "...just stop with the questions already."

When she told me Pax (a huge Panda the kids get to home from her pre-school as part of a group exercise) was just a "stuffed toy" I was stunned into silence. For years, since she could first talk, all her "stuffed toys" had names with their own personalities, likes and dislikes. Now Pax is just a "stuffed toy" without emotions or a care in the world of where he sits, eats or sleeps.

This afternoon she initiated a tossing of "stuffed toys". We filled up a whole laundry hamper of stuffed toys. At the beginning of the project I was quite excited that we would be finding new homes for them, but as the laundry hamper bag started to overflow I quietly and silently protested some of her choices.

I couldn't toss "Birthday Doggie" away -- a toy we picked out together on her third birthday. It was just the two of us and it kinda felt like a last hurrah before sweet Ryan arrived on the scene.
I couldn't toss "Blue-e" -- her first dino that sat so proudly on top of her presents for her second Christmas, blue-e was loved so much in his first few years. It was a favorite for quite sometime.
I couldn't toss "Julia-Gulia", her first dolly from Grandma either. Way too sentimental.

My baby girl is growing up. I am sad. I am happy. And I am all the things in between. She is still Maggie though. Complete with all her classic Maggie observations and continuous throng of questions. In the car today we were talking about germs and why its important to wash hands when she said something to the affect of, "... oh I know. The sperm gets us sick, then leaves us and gets other people sick. That's how it happens." Thinking I had heard her wrong or that she had misspoken I said, "Do you mean germs Maggie?" Her reply --"No mummy, I mean sperm. Sperm is what makes people sick."

First Kiss

I dropped Maggie off at pre-school today and was seriously running on low batteries due to my lack of sleep. I was in need of a caffeine boast, something --anything. I managed to watch Ryan fall and bruise his temple and lose my car keys (that seems to becoming a habit). Fortunately, the car keys were found and I managed to leave her pre-school without any more major happenings.

I got my something, my boast when I saw Maggie receive a sweet little kiss from one of her playmates , Oliver. Oliver is such a sweet, friendly and very happy boy. His hair is, more often than not, always a tousled mess and he has big hazel eyes that look at you with wonder and curiosity. He's the kind of kid with one sock up and one sock down that no sooner is your back turned he's in the dirt getting his hands dirty. The most overarching part of his personality however is his kind heart. He shows a lot of empathy and loves his friends in the kindest way I have seen a child love. Not too pushy, childishly honest, and protective.

Today, Maggie was not fairing well was being a little clingy to me. When I was distracted with Ryan, Oliver had come over to Maggie, put his arms around her, held her hand and gave her two sweet little kisses on the lips. After that, they were of running a playing together. It was a lovely thing to witness and I was very appreciative that he was able to help Maggie out of her funk.

I wish I could tell Oliver how sweet he is and how much of a difference he makes to Maggie's little world. How every morning I drop Maggie off I look out for him, not to hook him up with Maggie, but to watch him play and interact with everyone around him. He really is a lovely little boy, any parent would be proud to claim their own.

Kindergarten Readiness

Today, Maggie had her first assessment for kindergarten readiness. While I never doubted Maggie's readiness to attend kindergarten I was worried about her willingness to perform for a teacher she had never met. At the end of the assessment I recognized that it felt more like me taking the test rather than Maggie.


This is Maggie's story -:


The night before Maggie's kindergarten assessment I told her that we would be visiting a kindergarten school where a teacher would like to meet her and ask her a few questions. She accepted the news just fine and may have said something like, "You mean where five year olds go? Will I be five tomorrow?"


Over breakfast the following morning I remind Maggie of our scheduled day. Laundry, shower, gymnastics, lunch and then kindergarten. She happily accepts all the details and asks if she can watch a movie while I take my morning shower. I oblige her with a yes and breath a sigh of relief that Maggie seems to be taking the kindergarten meeting in her stride. I briefly wonder what questions might be on the assessment and worry a little if they'll ask her to write her name, as we are still working together on that skill but, but decide there's nothing to do about it and that it is not worth the worry. I know she'll be ready by the time fall 2008 rolls around.


On the way to her gymnastics class Maggie starts in with the questions about kindergarten, "Will other kids be there for me to play with? When will I be five? Is it the school with the tiger (school mascot of another neighborhood school)?" Then she said, "But I'll be shy. I won't want to answer their questions."

I feigned ignorance and made out that being shy and not answering the questions the teacher asked was okay, "Maggie, that's okay. You'll be fine. Just know that the teacher really wants to meet you and just wants ask you a few questions. You only need to answer the questions you want to. The teacher will like you Maggie."

"Why?" Maggie asks. "She'll like you because she's a teacher and all teachers like children and they know just how to talk to children, especially if they're feeling shy." We exchange dialogues for a little longer. She reinstated that she would not be wanting to say anything and I did my best to keep the tempo low and reassure her that I thought she would do just fine.


Well, arriving at the school Maggie was not shy. She was not quiet. In fact, she did not stop talking. Eager to show the teacher just how much she knew, she elaborated on every detail at every opportunity she saw. Her opening comment upon entering the classroom was, "This chair is bigger than the chairs at my pre-school and darker too. My pre-school has chairs which are light blue and you have chairs which are dark blue."


After being tested for her recognition of basic shapes she said, "I know all sorts of shapes. I know oval too." When she was asked to count to 10 she made it all the way up to 21 before being asked to stop by the teacher. When asked about the colour of several crayons she explained how the black crayon was black but had grey paper wrapped around it. When asked to write her name she began with the letter "M" and then announced that this time she did the "M" a little differently, each successive letter she sounded out phonetically and narrated how each letter should be drawn, "... g. ga-ga. I have two gees in my name. g. ga-ga. first you draw a circle and then the tail. down and then whoop..."

I was hearing my very own words play themselves back to me. I dared a glance up at her and she had a huge - I mean a HUGE grin on her face. This was the first time she had written and spelled out her name without any help. She missed one letter out in writing her name, but I didn't care. She was performing and was so proud of herself. She was gorgeous.

When the assessment came to an end she saw the teacher circle "no" on an assessment sheet. Maggie was very prompt in asking the teacher, "Why did you circle that one 'no' ?" to which the teacher replied, "Oh. You can read too! I can tell you've been to pre-school. You know so much. Very bright." At which point, I couldn't resist but say, "Well, erh. Most of what she knows comes from me. Her pre-school focuses on social skills, and we're working together on writing her name. She wants to get it just perfect."

Which is true by the way. Practically any new task Maggie takes on, she wants to do just perfectly.