Objectivity is a Virtue

Got a call back from the evaluator today. Emotions are amix. We discussed the possibility of autism. In her observations (without my input) she would borderline him as being at risk. At the end of the conversation I asked her not to currently recommend further evaluations but to reevaluate at twenty-four months -- a standard time when autism is checked for at well baby visits.

I've got the mother load of mothers guilt tonight. Maybe if I paid more attention to him during the day. Maybe if I sat down with him and did puzzles, and drawing. Maybe if I enrolled him in playgroups...

Then again, I say -- this is just who he is. Please don't label him. Put your pens down and just watch him. Talk to him, not at him. Hold him, hug him. Laugh with him, play with him. Wait; watch and listen. Look at him with your eyes, your heart and your soul. Forget the checklist. Toss it to one side and come back at playtime.

Objectivity is truly a virtue when it comes to providing your child with all that he needs and protecting him from the things he does not.

Pax Is Just A Stuffed Toy

There was once a day when I could talk my way in and out of almost anything with short and age appropriate explanations and reasoning. I could even use my child's personification of inanimate objects to get her to do something. Not so much these days.

Now all I hear is, "Why's that?" or "what does that mean?" While these can be answered one right after the other with ease at the beginning of the day, patience starts to wear thin at the end. But, we are working through them and I'm learning a new parenting skill on how to say anything but the ultimate mummy mantra "...because I told you so" or "...just stop with the questions already."

When she told me Pax (a huge Panda the kids get to home from her pre-school as part of a group exercise) was just a "stuffed toy" I was stunned into silence. For years, since she could first talk, all her "stuffed toys" had names with their own personalities, likes and dislikes. Now Pax is just a "stuffed toy" without emotions or a care in the world of where he sits, eats or sleeps.

This afternoon she initiated a tossing of "stuffed toys". We filled up a whole laundry hamper of stuffed toys. At the beginning of the project I was quite excited that we would be finding new homes for them, but as the laundry hamper bag started to overflow I quietly and silently protested some of her choices.

I couldn't toss "Birthday Doggie" away -- a toy we picked out together on her third birthday. It was just the two of us and it kinda felt like a last hurrah before sweet Ryan arrived on the scene.
I couldn't toss "Blue-e" -- her first dino that sat so proudly on top of her presents for her second Christmas, blue-e was loved so much in his first few years. It was a favorite for quite sometime.
I couldn't toss "Julia-Gulia", her first dolly from Grandma either. Way too sentimental.

My baby girl is growing up. I am sad. I am happy. And I am all the things in between. She is still Maggie though. Complete with all her classic Maggie observations and continuous throng of questions. In the car today we were talking about germs and why its important to wash hands when she said something to the affect of, "... oh I know. The sperm gets us sick, then leaves us and gets other people sick. That's how it happens." Thinking I had heard her wrong or that she had misspoken I said, "Do you mean germs Maggie?" Her reply --"No mummy, I mean sperm. Sperm is what makes people sick."

Brush Your Teeth

Most parents know the angst tooth brushing can bring to bedtime and morning routine. I am no exception to that and in my early attempts to make a somewhat unpleasant experience more fun, I came up with a song as I as brushing my daughters teeth.

Four years later I'm still singing it to her, as well as her younger brother. I imagine in time, I will forget that I ever did this so feel it warrants a blog entry before old age betrays me. I sing it twice through to the tune of "row, row, row your boat" which seems to last long enough for me get to their "upstairs teeth" as well as their "downstairs teeth".

So, without further ado -- the lyrics.


Brush, brush, brush you teeth,
Brush them everyday,
Brush, brush, brush your teeth,
Brush them twice a day

Brush, brush brush your teeth
Brush them everyday
Brush, brush, brush your teeth
Brush the food away